


Good Side Of Things (Left You With Both Of The Rings)

by gummyminyoongs



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Cheating, Happy And Sad Ending, M/M, Sad, i love them im sorry, its rambles
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-22
Updated: 2018-10-22
Packaged: 2019-08-05 20:37:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,037
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16374623
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gummyminyoongs/pseuds/gummyminyoongs
Summary: Doyoung lists why he loves Jungwoo.





	Good Side Of Things (Left You With Both Of The Rings)

Doyoung loved Jungwoo’s hands. Soft, pale skin covered by his larger, tougher ones. Hands pulled along a dark street at night, warm from hot chocolate and pastries. Loved it when his hands would find him in the middle of the night after a particularly loud sound of thunder or a scary dream. Fingers so good at catching tears and replacing them with love when Doyoung had been fired or when his cat had run away. Only those hands could grab and scratch red marks into Doyoung’s back as he pushed into him, pushing him farther and deeper than possible. He loved the hands even when they stopped touching him, too busy with work to even caress Doyoung’s cheek.

 

Doyoung loved Jungwoo’s mouth. Lips that shyly asked for his number in the coffee shop, after Doyoung had definitely been coming everyday to see, even if it made him late to work. Shy smiles evolving into big, unconcealed, and toothy ones when they had finally gone on that date to the movies and Doyoung dropped his popcorn all over himself as soon as he sat down. Teeth that shone brighter than any star and gave the most welcomed love bites when climax was reached, the pleasure almost unbearable. Even when the mouth wouldn’t ask how the older’s day was or why wasn’t he coming home, too busy to dream of opening for a silly thing. Doyoung loved his mouth as it spewed hate and betrayal and asked Doyoung, “how could you do this to me?” and all he could respond with was , “i don’t know.”

 

Doyoung loved Jungwoo’s eyes. Brown, almost black irises that looked away, embarrassed, as Doyoung ordered his first coffee from the new shop down the street. Eyes that would stare so heavily and so intensely, Doyoung could feel them from across the room. Eyelashes that were counted as they lay in bed, the other boy already sleeping after the energy from that night’s activities was used. Emotions that floated in them that couldn’t be concealed like the rest of his face. Admiration. Tenderness. Kindness. Love. Hate. Confusion. Hurt. Sorrow. Eyes filled to the brim with tears, willing not to let them fall as Doyoung shattered the only good thing left in his life with a simple, “I’m not coming home. I have to work late,” pink lipstick accidentally left on a collar, and the smell of cheap perfume in his car.

 

Doyoung loved Jungwoo’s voice. Barely audible. Only those willing to listen could really hear what he had to say. A laugh so full of sun that forced Doyoung to buy silly snoopy ornamentsand make stupid puns, just to hear it one more time.Voice so soft and sweet when it whispered “i love you” and moaned Doyoung’s name, but so hard and angry as it yelled to, “Get out!” and, “Never look at me again!” The same voice that surprised Doyoung six months after the breakup in a dimly-lit club at 1 am. A quiet, “Hey.. long time no see,” standing out from the drunken cheers and laughs. The same moans as before, this time in Doyoung’s new apartment on sheets that didn’t contain hurtful memories. And finally the voice that single-handedly returned life into Doyoung’s eyes with a shy, albeit hopeful, “maybe we can try again.”

 

Doyoung loved Jungwoo’s heart. Large enough for everyone and thing, but also small enough for Doyoung to fill it almost completely. A heart that beat for everyone not just himself. It saved a puppy from drowning in a drainage ditch, took him home, and tried so hard to keep life flowing into it’s tiny lungs. A heart that was able to forgive and not forget, but move past Doyoung’s mistake. To finally trust him again and let Doyoung fill the empty hole left behind by his leaving. “Too big of a heart,” Doyoung said as he cradled the smaller boy when the dog just couldn’t stay awake anymore and they had to say goodbye. That too big of a heart is what Doyoung blames for Jungwoo leaving to pick up a drunk friend in the middle of the night. A heart too gentle to even bother Doyoung by waking him up and say where he was going, “it will only take a minute.” His heart is what had him out in the streets at 3 am, just in time for a drunkard to climb into his truck and fall asleep at the wheel. Fall asleep right as his truck collided with the boy who held Doyoung’s entire world.

 

Doyoung loves Jungwoo. He loves the way his nose scrunches when he’s upset, and the small noises he makes when he’s happy. He loves the memories, good and bad, that keep him awake at night. Loves the ghost of his breath on his face right before he kisses him. Doyoung loves him even when he was told that the younger no longer did, and then even more when he tried to rebuild what was horribly broken. Doyoung loves Jungwoo as he stares, tears falling, at the battered body connected to thousands of wires and tubes. He loves him even when the sterile white feeling of the hospital room is so “not” Jungwoo, that Doyoung tries to bring in flowers and the snoopy ornaments to brighten it up. The same love that drives Doyoung to sign the consent forms and watch as the thousands of wires and tubes were taken off, and labored heavy breathing relaxes into silence. Doyoung loves Jungwoo as he says his final goodbyes when the coffin is lowered into the ground.

 

Because Jungwoo is Doyoung’s light in a dark room. His motivation to keep going, to breathe. Even when terrible things happen. His hands, mouth, eyes, voice, and heart all scream for Doyoung to move on, but don’t forget. Jungwoo is always with Doyoung, and a part of Doyoung will always remain with Jungwoo, so he can never forget even if he tries through liquor and medication. As he turns to leave his lover for the last time, he drops a note into the earth to do just that. To remember.

 

 “Thank you Jungwoo. For teaching me kindness, happiness, forgiveness, and love. Yours forever, DY”

**Author's Note:**

> :( i thought of this while i was in bed and now it’s 2:30 am and i have to be up in three hours. I’ve never written anything like this before so idk


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